Betrayal of Age

The frisbee came flying at me and as I moved to catch it I tripped over this step in my yard.  It was one of those falls in infinite slow motion.  I was going down incrementally, with each new hit I thought surely that was the end of the fall, but it just kept going.  I tripped, my leg hit the step, then my hip, and I thought, ‘surely this is it,’ but no, then my upper body toppled over and hit the shed.

That’s right nursing humans.  I’m a fall risk.

When I finally came to rest my kids were silent.  I think if I were 30 years old we would have all been laughing our butts off.  But when you are almost 50 and you fall people get scared.

Levi came over to help me up, but I needed to make sure I hadn’t broken anything before I moved because the pain was pretty intense.  Zach said, “That looked bad.”

In my head I was thinking, “this is what it looks like when an almost 50 year old woman plays frisbee with the kids.”

There are defining moments when we have to face the betrayals of age.  When I discovered that the painful feeling in my fingers was never going to go away because I had arthritis–that was one of those moments.  My kids’ reaction to my fall was another one.

In my job as a nurse I have patients who tell me, “this has been a wake up call for me.”  These are the words of a patient who came into the hospital with blood sugar of 690 (normal blood sugar is 60-100).  Or the alcoholic who suffered debilitating seizures while detoxing and knows that he might not survive another bout with the bottle.

When we’re younger we can get away with eating all of the things.  We can get away with drinking too much.  Our body can recover from all of the abuses we inflict on ourselves–for a while.  We are invincible.  And then, usually incrementally, sometimes suddenly, the betrayal of age sets in.  Many times it’s incremental and we continue to ignore it until it smacks us to the ground.

If you ignore the smackdown, things don’t go well.  Whether it’s limiting the number of massages you do in a week, getting into an alcohol recovery program, adhering to the diet restrictions that keep you from getting an A1C of 14 (that’s really bad for diabetics), taking up exercise, meditation, massage, and relaxation practices to help keep your blood pressure down, if you don’t make those changes life becomes incredibly difficult.  And not just on you, but on everybody who cares about you.

I guess that means I need to be a more cautious frisbee player.  Dylan Thomas comes to mind.  I don’t want to have to be careful!!  My bruises are still healing, but I was able to get a chiropractic adjustment today, and when my bruises clear up I’ll get a massage.

The underlying message in all of these things is to stay open to new ways of living, new ways of eating, new ways of managing health.  It is inevitable that the betrayal of age will hit us all at some point, and our quality of life is directly related to whether we are open to adapting to those new normals.

Or maybe I just need to pay better attention to my surroundings eh?  Yep.  Cuz I’m a doofus.

 

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8 thoughts on “Betrayal of Age

  1. I’ve felt this betrayal many times, and I’m always surprised….and dismayed. I strive for grace but often fail. Very good writing Wendy. Thanks for sharing.

  2. How beautifully conceived and written. A positive attitude on pur personal aging awareness. I recommend you share with AARP Magazine or fb page.say I who at 68 , spent 6 hrs digging my garden yesterday.

  3. Wendy, I feel your pain (having been in similar circumstances). Aging gracefully is a goal we can strive for: Heal well! Keep up the good work!

  4. I’m so glad you didn’t break anything. Aging is humbling and as my mom used to say “it’s not for sissy’s”. Over the 60 mark now and unable to do things I used to, due to RA. It does require looking at things differently, taking better care of yourself and a good sense of humor. I really would like to age gracefully and I have opportunities every day to learn how.

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